What about love at first sight? Does it really exist and can be the basis for a long-term relationship, or is it just a fabrication of incurable romantics?
It should be as follows: you're walking down the street, sitting in a restaurant or walking on the beach (of course you can put in any activity) and suddenly that person is at your viewing angle. All you need is one look to know that you could imagine the rest of your life alongside this person. Eyes get into each other, and even if you don't normally do that, you just have to reach out to them because you know that otherwise, you'd blame yourself for the rest of your life. They, of course, have the same thing, and what's more; as soon as you start talking to each other, your personalities, souls and fates will naturally fit together.
Without love at first sight, the authors of the great books and the lyricists of the great pieces of music would not be born, but the question is to what extent it is a possible fact, and to what extent it is just a romantically unrealistic fiction: "Of course, it has happened to me several times that a stranger caught my eye at first sight. A couple of times it was mutual, and we started talking, but it never got any better. Most of the time, I found that we absolutely do not sit down and only on attraction the relationship cannot be built." says 30-year-old Maliha, describing her experience of love at first sight. And her opinion is more or less the same in the case of almost all women. Out of the 18 people, only one woman has a personal experience of love at first sight, which grows into a longer (maybe nearly five-month) relationship.
On the other hand, it was love at first sight that supposedly took place, for example, between Carla Bruni and former French President Nicolas Sarkozy. The former top model said on CNBC television that one look was enough, and she felt a passion she had never experienced in her life. After nine weeks, they got married. So how is it with love at first sight, and how do experts view this romantic phenomenon, and what do they think of it?
It is more common in men According to scientists, twelve areas of the brain participate in the feeling of love, and love is very similar in terms of chemical composition to those experienced by people after ingestion of cocaine. But the feeling that you look at someone in the eye and suddenly know that you will walk together all your life has a much more prosaic explanation than the famous authors give us.
Some studies claim that love at first sight is actually a lightning selection of physical features. Subconsciously, based on them, we evaluate who is genetically compatible with us. Contrary to popular belief, men at first glance fall in love more often than women (it is believed that this is due to the greater susceptibility of men to visual stimuli). You are more likely to be met by love at a young age.
However, the basis of success is supposedly a long look in the eye. Scientists at the University of Chicago say that which part of your chosen person's body you focus on when you first meet determines whether you feel love or passion for them. While love at first sight requires a look in the eye or face, sexual attraction is based on monitoring the figure of an unknown man/woman. In a thorough analysis of the eye movement of the research respondents, the researchers found that the time to awaken love at first sight and sexual desire is approximately the same, however, it differed from what part of the body of the unknown attractive person the participants of the research focused on.
Scientists have also found that it only takes 0.2 seconds of visual contact to feel love at a glance. During this time, there will be a dramatic rise in levels of dopamine, oxytocin, adrenaline, vasopressin, and other complex chemical processes in the brain. The result is a feeling of euphoria known as love.
Narcissistic affair How come we feel love for some people at first sight, while thousands of others walk past us without making themselves registered? According to a study conducted at the Rowett Research Institute and the University of Aberdeen, this is a combination of several factors. On the one hand, we supposedly subconsciously choose individuals for whom we assume similar characteristics as we have ourselves (social, financial, and educational). But pheromones, i.e. like-substances, also come into play to a large extent, which, among other things, determines whom we find attractive.
A much more sceptical and cynical view of the love at first sight is held by the authors of a 2007 research. According to them, this is primarily a matter of sexual attraction and our ego. Feelings supposedly play no part in it at all, and it's purely a narcissistic act because we're attracted to the people who are attracted to us. This principle is said to be advantageous from an evolutionary point of view; it is clear that you will not waste your time with someone who is not interested in you.
And if you want to know what hope you have that your love at first sight will last and you two will go side by side for the rest of your life, you will be interested in the conclusion of research by Israeli scientists. According to them, one in ten cases of love at first sight ends in a long-term relationship.
Dr Earl Neumann's well-known bestseller 'Love At First Sight' is based on research of nearly 1500 respondents. As part of this study, its author then came to very surprising results. Among other things, he found that two-thirds of those surveyed believed in love at first sight, and more than half who fell in love in a matter of moments eventually married or married their partner.
These spectacular statistics are complemented by the finding that the divorce rate of marriage, which arises from love at first sight, reaches a very low level. According to Dr Neumann, three-quarters of these couples will stay together forever.
There is no need to get to know each other What is the power of love at first sight? According to several studies, nature is behind the magic of such rapprochement. Love at first glance can then simply be defined as an instinctive thing. For example, according to a psychology magazine, mutual attraction is based primarily on local sensations.
Nature also likes to pair those who are visually similar (they have a similar composition of genetic information) to ensure the strong genetic makeup of their offspring. Such instinctive revelations then take place in minutes, so long-term cognition is no longer needed.
Love without thinking This natural phenomenon is commented on by Malcolm Gladwell, author of The Power Of Thinking Without Thinking: "When you get to know someone, your mind makes an instant judgment about them as part of the first impression. These quick conclusions are usually very powerful, important, and often correct."
It is then similar to choosing a queue at the checkouts in the supermarket. You're going to get to the first one, but after a while, you're going to change your mind, and you're going to wait somewhere else. However, in the new queue, you will find that the lady in front of you forgot to consider vegetables, the cashier does not accept credit cards, and that the line you chose the first time is long over. Thoughtless and quick decisions are simply the best.
Instant love However, the question remains whether love at first sight is really a sign of a long and quality relationship... After all, instant noodles are always worse than those that cook slowly. Is today's time so rushed that there is simply no time to develop a full-fledged relationship?
It is not a complete miracle to fall in love at first sight, according to scientific findings. The heart follows instinct, and love subsequently undergoes rapid but natural development. However, the first impression should not be an entirely decisive criterion in the choice of partner. After all, there are a number of areas that need to be explored before we decide to spend the rest of our lives with the "right" one. After all, even buying a Ferrari should be preceded by a proper test drive...